(I actually wrote this post on Tuesday. I wasn't sure if I would post it or not, but decided today, I do want to share...especially this awesome quote. So, here it is!)

"Shake off this sadness, and recover your
spirit;
sluggish you will never see the wheel of fate
that brushes your heel as it turns going by,
the man who wants to live is the man in
whom life is abundant."-Miguel De Unamuno

I woke up this morning feeling kind of down. I suppose it started yesterday. I had to go to the dentist yesterday for my regular cleaning, plus to have a filling fixed, which I thought when I had seen my dentist 6 months ago he had told me it had a cavity beneath it. It turns out to my great relief, it didn't.

There were a couple of years, when things were rough with running my own business (Yoga studio), that I actually neglected going to the dentist on a regular basis. I consider myself to have good oral hygiene, flossing and brushing regulary, but in light of my more recent and regular visits, I can hardly believe that I would have ever thought I couldn't afford to take care of myself and my health. I guess one of the reasons I started feeling down was because of the anticipated expense I would have to incur for this visit. As an independent contractor, I have my own health insurance, but the benefits aren't great and the expense for the coverage is quite a lot. So, I do not have dental on my plan, because I figured at this place in my life and with good oral hygiene, I could handle the additional expense of taking care of my teeth on a regular basis. So, this is what I opted to do, although yesterday, the idea of not having dental coverage really began to get me down...

I started to go into that "it's not fair" conversation. "It's not fair that I work hard and yet I'm not able to benefit from the benefits of health insurance," I thought. At one place where I work, in order to receive health coverage, I have to be a full-time employee teaching 15 classes for them each week. This is not in my vision, nor how I feel I am most effective in my ability to touch others through my work, yet this is the requirement so, therefore, I'm not eligible. Sometimes policies like this frustrate me. Regardless, I began to feel downhearted yesterday.

So, after my cleaning, (which is only my second time to go to this dentist, I went for the first time earlier this year) I waited in the dentist chair for him to be ready to fill, and I thought, fix a cavity. I will say there is something really unique about this man, and I noticed that my first time there. There is a beautiful little sign in one of the rooms that says:

"What we need is much less than what we think we need." - Maya Angelou

I had expressed that I was feeling a little afraid about having to go through this procedure and was worried about having to have novicaine, etc. I just wasn't overjoyed about being at the dentist, although I did feel grateful to at least be at a point where I can afford to take care of my dental health. As I was laying in the chair, I reached back and rubbed my neck a little bit with my hand. He asked, "Does your neck hurt? Would you like me to give you a little massage?" I laughed saying, "Sure." So, he proceeded to give me a little neck rub. This was definitely a first at the dentist. As he talked me through the process, he realized there was definitely no cavity and he would only have to fix the filling, in other words, the whole experience would be pain free.

After we got done, which only took about 10 minutes, I got up out of the chair and thanked him for the wonderful experience and the absence of pain. I joked that I was a little afraid about having to come to see him. It must have been that I expressed feeling afraid, because from there he began to talk with me about the Nature of life, God, faith, the soul and our journey here on this planet as a Spirit in this human body. He spent over 20 minutes sharing his inspired words with me and there were a few moments where I found myself getting emotional. He talked about Love and the word for it in Spanish, which is Amor. He said that it translates from Latin as being A-without and mor-death. He said when we are filled with love for the Holy Spirit, which resides within us and also around us, we are without death. When we awaken to the fullness of this Love, a love so rich and full for our Creator, or God, the life-giving Force which animates allkind, we literally transcend death. When we have this love alive within us it can never die. There is nothing to fear and we can trust our Heavenly Father to guide us and take care of us with every breath we breathe. He, the Heavenly Father, literally wants us to surrender to Him this trust, this faith, in every breath he's breathing into our body. And, our whole point for being in this human body is to love and to know this love. At moments, I found myself feeling a little resistant, too. "What is this guy trying to do?" Why is he talking to me like this." "He's trying to witness to me about Jesus." He certainly did talk about all of this in relation to Jesus Christ, the Savior, but he also acknowledged that it really is above all, about love...of and for the Father, the Creator. If we surrender fully to following His will, and trust His will, he will transform us, awaken us, enlighten us to new understandings, empower and encourage us in everything we do, and we through Him, we will be able to realize undreamed of possibilities. But, I must say, when he finished talking with me I appreciated what he had to say. There was something so incredibly genuine and sincere and heartfelt and his words have resonated with me in my heart and mind since then. I suppose more than anything, I feel a deeper sense of peace within me, than I did before. Then, he literally took my hands and he said a prayer for me. Can you believe this? I mean, have you ever heard of this? It was rather surreal. But, I felt his sincerity and his honestness and so I allowed myself to receive his Spirit-filled words and prayer. Before I left his presence, we gave each other a hug. I don't think I've ever hugged my dentist. Then, as I was checking out with the receptionist, he came to the front desk and said, "Do not charge her today, just send it to her insurance." And, she replied, "But, doctor, the thing is she doesn't have insurance, only a discount card." And, he said, "Well then, no charge for anything."

I left and walked to the elevator with tears welling in my eyes. The relief, although appearing to be financial, was really much deeper. Perhaps I was so deeply impacted becuase I felt the truthfulness and genuineness of his intent and words. He wasn't just talking about Love, he was Being Love. Love is the most transformative energy on the planet, and the very reason why God lived in Jesus and all of the great Saints and Sages, (and lives in us) to teach us about this Divine Love and trust in the Divine Will, through our fellow human Beings. Remarkable!

So, I love this quote which I wrote in the beginning of this post. It really resonated with me today, as I was still feeling a little down, even though I had felt such a genuinely caring presence of another yesterday. I still woke up with a bit of a heavy heart this morning, as I looked ahead to the day which seemed to hold the same unresolved questions and answers as the day before. But, as I read this quote first thing this morning on my Zen Calendar for today, it left a lasting imprint on me, just as the doctor's words have continued to resound within me today and throughout this week. I chose this morning to look up, rather than look down. I decided to be with whatever hurt is inside, but to not let it ruin my day or my perspective on life.

And, so it is. Life is good... Read more